1) Chiming in with yet another "call your Mom" vote. Yeah, the pride may suffer, but in the long run you will thank yourself. Who knows? Given the stress she is currently under, she probably didn't mean to be quite to harsh.

2) Can't help much there, being well and truly retired, myself. Best I can suggest is that you focus your energies on what you enjoy in fanfic... ie. the stories, and the friends you've made. As for the rest, I'd just try to let it slide on past.